Update of my jobless life...

Few weeks have gone by and I still hasn't got the answer. So today I just did a "rush" thing ie mass sending of resume in jobstreet! But I realized I started to lose even more confident in interview.... I'm not as strong as I thought I am.

Another transition...

Life suck with future so uncertainties ahead. Many people have been asking me "so whats next?" and i totally couldnt answer them. All i could do is put on a smile, raise my eyesbow and "change topic". But right deep down in my heart, im still searching for the answer.

...

Im such a failure, screwing up my first career. It time that i should let go. I once thought that if i were to hold on to it longer (perhaps after probation), i may get familiar with the things happening, the SOP and stuff, and be more confident in decisions making.

But I was wrong.

Its not Xi guan jiu hao. Its yue xian yue sheng.

The decisions I have made eventually came back hitting hard at me.

I cant even guide myself and i was expected to guide the team of people with at least 10 years of experience.

Im not even firm in questioning/scolding let alone allowing my team to depend on me to back them up.

:(

Walking out of this is so not easy.

Its not just about typing and handing in letter. Its not so easy...

...

Knowing what went wrong wasn't good enough.

another week of july

Looking forward to next Friday night meeting. Because that will mark an end to the tiring week.

And on the side note, really appreciate PKL's call last week. All my 气 and 苦 are voiced out. Thanks my friend!!! :) And you reminded me this is what I wanted in the first place, my "dream job". hahah.

习惯就好

Now I begin to realise...

For all these things, i have to be 习惯 because its something cant be avoided, and its just the beginning.

life is not about 开心就好, its 习惯就好.

有苦难言

This afternoon while eating lunch with my mum:

Mum: so far have you met with any problem in work?

Me: ...(after few seconds) of course lah.

Mum: what problem?

Me: iyah say already you also dont know want lah. (den i go to the kitchen sink to wash hand)